If you are subjecting yourself to the misery that is dry January (I mean, seriously, Jan is the longest, most miserable month of the year and this January is worse than most), you may find that you are missing those big impy stouts you were slugging back with reckless abandon over the festive period. To help you fill the hole left by all those chubby stouts, I have had a look at some low alcohol alternatives, but do they even come close to scratching the impy itch?
Big Drop Brewing Co - Off-Piste, Hazelnut Porter
0.5% ABV
66 Cal per bottle
Off the bat this smells great. I get real hints of stout/porter rich malts, a bit of toastiness, caramel and hazelnuts, this has everything going for it... on the nose. Get Off-Piste in the mouth and things aren't quite as amazing as the olfactory bulb was letting on. The bottle says there should be chocolate notes, I'm not getting those. What I am getting is the taste of instant coffee that has had too much water added to it, there is also a faint aroma of cigarette butt in the background. If that sounds hugely negative, it shouldn't. There is something masochistically enjoyable about the tingle the huge amount of burnt bitterness sends down my spine, although I don't think this would be for everyone. However, a bit more body, a touch more sweetness and this could be a winner.
Score - 3.5
Mikkeller - Beer Geek Flat White
0.3% ABV
30 Cal per 100 ml
Despite the addition of oats, which I usually associate with a rich, velvety mouthfeel, Beer Geek Flat White drank more like a black lager than a stout. However, there were good coffee notes and a really apparent orange oil flavour which provided a nice point of interest. I liked the flavour profile for the most part, but this really disappointed. I was expecting massive things from the low alcohol beer geek, unfortunately Mikkeller didn't really deliver. The flavour that was there dissipated way too quickly and this was slightly too effervescent for my taste.
Score - 3.25
Drop Bear Beer Co - Bonfire Stout
0.5% ABV
69.3 Cal per bottle
The antipodean side of me loves the name and the branding of Drop Bear Beer Co and what is not to like about the idea of Bonfire Stout? There are smoky notes coming through on the nose and just a hint of orange zest and spice. Bonfire Stout is thin on the tongue as you would expect, but the smoked malt and roasted barley give this a very pleasing smoke flavour which cuts through the inevitable sweetness. There is also a soda water/metallic taste on the finish, as with a lot of non or low alcohol beers, but I would rate this very highly as an attempt at a low alcohol stout. Yes it is a bit thin, but it isn't miles away from a Guinness export in terms of flavour profile, just with more smoke.
Score - 4.0
Lola - Coffee Porter
0.34% ABV
32 Cal per 100ml
Lola Porter gives massively strong coffee notes on the nose and, what is this? A surprisingly pleasing, thick pour. All of this is giving me high hopes that this one is going to really deliver. There is a lot of body to this, probably the closest in mouthfeel to a contemporary craft porter. There is a nice touch of bitterness coming through from the coffee beans but there is an odd, juicy fruit gum flavour on the finish. It is odd, but not entirely unpleasant and actually makes this a slightly refreshing tasting brew, which is odd in something tht looks and feels just like a good porter. I would absolutely buy this again, even outside of dry January.
Score 4.25
Comments